Thursday, September 1, 2016

That Old Melancholy

Here we are at the first day of school again and I am feeling that old familiar melancholy. 
(I am loving the reflection of the American flag)

I was doing well this morning. We had our ducks all in a row and everything ran very smoothly. We even arrived at school early and had plenty of time for extra photos. The kids were thrilled with the extra photos part. I jest.

But they did oblige me with more than a fair share of pictures. I just had this urge to take as many pictures as I could. After all, this is the last first day of school with ALL of my kids at the same school. It was kind of a big deal. 
The last year all of my kids will ever go to the same school together. Wow. That really hit home. My kids really do enjoy each other so much. They hang with each other at lunch. They play together at recess. They are always searching each other out. I used to worry about it. I wondered if they would ever form strong enough bonds with friends their own age if they constantly stayed within their sibling group. I don't really think about that anymore. They have friends, but honestly? I think they still prefer each other's company.  I wonder if they will ever know how lucky they are to have that. And I hope and pray it stays that way.

One by one I followed the kids to their classrooms. I watched Joey and Tommy set their backpacks in their lockers and head into their classrooms. Moments later a nervous Tommy came out and asked me what I thought he should do. I told him that maybe he could organize his books into the order of his classes. Or maybe ask the teacher. Tommy marched up to his new middle school teacher and said, "Excuse me, what would you suggest I be doing right now?" I had to turn away quickly to stifle my giggle. It was adorable. 

As Tommy and Joe organized their books I walked Ben and Grace downstairs to their classrooms. More pictures were taken and good-bye hugs and kisses were given. Though the kids seemed fine I had a hard time pulling myself away from their classrooms. 

I hung around in the hallways at school far longer than I needed to. I kept peeking into classrooms. Checking in. Tommy caught my eye and came out to show me how he had arranged his notebook for optimum organization. The kid was nervous for his first day of middle school. So many changes. "It's a little overwhelming, actually." he told me in the hallway before heading back into the class room. 

For me too, Tommy. Me too. It is all just overwhelming. Watching these little people grow by leaps and bounds every day. It is overwhelming how my love for them just continues to multiply. It is overwhelming trying to learn to let go little by little. Wanting to hold on tight but knowing this is what is right. What is meant to be. It is overwhelming watching them be brave and independent and strong and kind. It is all just overwhelming.
Dear God in heaven,
please be with my children as they start a new year.
Help them to work hard and do their best.
Keep them safe, happy, and healthy.

Give them a love for learning.
Help them to grow in confidence and independence. 
Show them how to be compassionate.
Let them be a friend to all, kind, and loving.
Let their failures motivate them to try harder.
Let their successes humble them.
Help me, Lord, to be patient, understanding, loving, and wise
in guiding them through this school year.
Be with my children, Lord.
Let your light shine in them and through them
and keep them close to You.

Amen

9 comments:

betty said...

Amen with your prayer.

I'm sure Tommy will be a pro before long with the goings on with middle school :)

Great looking bunch of kids! Wishing the ma successful year of school! There is always something melancholy about the first day of school, isn't there? My niece has 3 kids and her oldest is in 8th grade this year; so last year too that the kids will be together in the same school (they go to a private school too). It just goes by so fast, doesn't it?

betty

Kat said...

All of autumn is melancholy for me and it all starts with the first day of school. It really does go so fast. Too fast.

Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

I can't even imagine. My girls won't all be at the same school at the same time, but I will still likely be full of melancholy. This growing up and changing business is hard.

Bijoux said...

There are times that I'm sad to no longer have school children, but I sure don't miss the homework!

Great pictures of some great kids!

Kat said...

Yep. I would be a melancholy mess no matter what the situation. ;) I've never been good with change.

Kat said...

I will NEVER miss the homework. Or the crazy schedules. I guess that is why I always mourn the end of summer.

Tabor said...

It is sadly beautiful to see them turn into lovely young citizens an you are certainly blessed that they have such strong family ties.

Elaine Alguire said...

I just cannot even believe how old our children are getting! Hope they have a wonderful year, all being at the same school together, how cool!

Hilary said...

Your kids are amazing, Kat. They are truly special and that's a testament to their parents. I can't believe how tall Joseph is and how grown up Grace looks.. and she looks so much like you. They're lovely. Enjoy every day. (I know you do) :)

Words To Live By

Be grateful for each new day.
A new day that you have never lived before.
Twenty-four new, fresh, unexplored hours to use usefully and profitably.
We can squander, neglect, or use them.
Life will be richer or poorer by the way we use today.
Finish every day and be done with it.
You have done what you could;
some blunders and absurdities crept in;
forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day.
You shall begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be
encumbered with your old nonsense.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson